Trish, Oregon (3/7/21)
I lost my Mom to "Trumpism" I can't stand that word for what it means. My Mom was always a soft spoken, sweet, kind and funny woman. We come from a blended Family. My aunt is half black, my other aunt is half Vietnamese and I now have Hispanic/Vietnamese and Black/White cousins. It's always been a big old pot of love. 40+ people at every holiday, laughter and so many different types of food...good times.
Then, my Parents got divorced. My Dad met someone new and so did my Mom. At first, he didn't seem bad for her. He fell all over himself to please her. However, slowly but surely, he influenced her. My mom stopped getting her nails done, stopped wearing heels or any shoe beyond a "Romeo" boot. Camo print everywhere.
Next thing I knew they owned 15 guns, started going to church and my mom registered as a Republican from a lifelong Democrat. Soon she changed her cover photo on Facebook to one of Trump giving a thumbs up. She started posting stories about "Jew lasers" (My Husband comes from a Jewish Family) She went so far as to try and convince me that my Husband has trapped me with his "lies" and I should leave him, come to God and vote for our savior Trump. No joke...
My Husband shared a post about the election outcome, calling for peace, Love and to move on as a country together. My mom attacked him, both on Facebook and text messages telling him to respect Trump, calling him a narciccist and saying he was controlling me. Called him many names and was in general anti-Semitic. This was NUTS. I generally stay out of their tiffs because my Husband is graceful and can usually pacify her. However, she was a viper this time. She quickly drug me into it and started calling me a traitor. That I'd been betraying her since I was a child. Crazy..She laughed when told that far right extremists destroyed a vigil for an unarmed man killed by police. She LAUGHED and said "it was a black guy wasn't it" I could feel my heart shatter. My Mom...
My mom who once marched for equality now marches to the beat of a different drum. From burning man festivals and tarot cards to Trump rallies and bible verses..I'm devastated and wish I could get her back. I don't know how...My kids miss her but she's not well. How can I knowingly let her around them when she believes as she does? Why can't she remember who she is??.
I have a picture of my Mom and my aunt sitting in a circle passing around a joint with basically every color of the rainbow, happy as hell at a festival. Now, she's just a shell...a reflection of every thing good she placed in me. My heart breaks and my soul feels like it's tearing apart. I was homeschooled, she was my best friend, my confidante, my Mommy. Now she's angry and unrecognizable. Where do we go from here???
I miss you, Mommy Love Baby Bear